A white Christmas
Christmas is surreal in the southern hemisphere with sweating Santas. A white Christmas of white surf, white sand and even white snowcaps in the South Island. This is how Christmas was meant to be. Lazy, hazy, days under a cloudless sky, not the dark skies, icy winds and needle sharp rain of British winters. I'm feeling relaxed, tanned and happy.

More voddy dahling?
I love doing radio. No spending 2 hours in makeup, or worrying about camera angles to find your ‘right side'. You can just roll into the studio and start talking bollocks. Chelfyn is in charge of tunes and Dodgy Sam and I are in charge of the talking bollocks.

We've needed a little Dutch courage to get into the swing of things. Last week we were leading the George guys in the studio next door astray with Mars Bar vodkas, this week it was Minty Aero vodkas and a spacehopping contest which we won. To make Mars Bar vodka take a lite of vodka, pour out a large shot and drink. Shove as many Mars Bars as you can into the bottle. Cover bottle in bowl with hot water, and shake to mix. Let cool and drink neat or with cream.

Spacehopping is not advised.