Celebrity Spoon-off

It's been an interesting week on online auction site Trademe.co.nz in which the more unusual items for sale include a hug (a snip at $500), a slap (no takers), and now a celebrity 'spoon'. Mike Puru, the cuddly ex-Flipside host and breakfast radio jock is offering a 60 second spoon to the highest bidder. Both participants must be covered by at east one layer of fabric (spoilsport!) and all proceeds are going to charidee. The current bid for a 60 second squeeze with Mike Puru is $584.69 and the auction closes on Thursday 5th May.

Puru says: "One thing all my previous partners have complimented me on (even after break-up) is my ability as a spooner. The highest bidder can decide whether we spoon beneath a sleeping bag or duvet. They can also choose whether they will be the big spoon or the little spoon. It can also be male or female.....there is nothing gay about spooning, hell, even Sir Edmund and Tensing did it for warmth once they got past base camp!"

As we all know Hilary and Tensing did in fact get past first base. But not in a gay way. If you are thinking of putting a bid in then I can clarify a few details:

Q. Hi Mike.. just wondering if nibbles on the ear are free during the 60 secs, and if so does the person getting spooned have to pretend they are into it ? Is grinding allowed and are we naked or clothed ?

A. Mike is in a relationship, so would prefer you wore at least one layer of clothing (as stated above in the description). Nibbling on the ear would have to be negotiated at the time of spooning. Grinding is only allowed if Mike goes first and if the winning bidder could please pretend to be into it, the experience would be so much more pleasurable for Mike.

Q. Will Mike have his teeth fixed before we spoon?
A. Unlikely, but if u choose to be 'little spoon' you won't see his teeth

Q. Hi there, is there any chance of a 'boner' from the Spooner while in this position? I'd feel 'violated' if that were the case. But then again...
A. There is a possiblity a 'wooden' spoon may appear.

Q. Would this also include a dinner and movie before the said spooning happens, also will mikes "partner" also be included ?
A. Sorry, no. No dinner or movie and no partner. Mike's a cheap date who doesn't like threesomes.

Which brings me to a new reality show idea: 'Celebrity Spoon-off'. How about Helen Clarke v Don Brash, Nicky Watson v Hayley Marie (I'll be judging that one) or Winston Peters v Tariana Turia. Even better lets make them spoon each other! This one could run and run.