Flow and Only Ooze the Shadow

I love finding examples of Engrish and was delighted to discover these gems on makeup at the local $2 store. First we have 'Gakeve Eyeshadow' which invites you to 'Flow and Only Ooze the Shadow!' The colours are super bright as described on the packet beautifully:

"Perfect to appear ourstanding colour is excellent to prolong malleability, result lasting, how heavily does it colour, can create repeatedly and steroscopic eyes the result."

Wow. I've always wanted steroscopic eyes like the bionic woman.

Next we have some Mascara that I am not to brave enough to put on my lashes (even if it was probably made in the same factory as the real thing), but the Engrish and Flench translations on the packaging were worth the purchase alone. After all you get the following delights:

'watertightness and length' with a special 'bual headed brush' which will not 'adhibit or agglomerate '. This wondrous item promises that with the 'magic power of waterproof and non-discolouring, the product can nurse your eye lash all the time.'

Fantastic. Now I'm imaging magic elves cosseting my lashes all night.