Rainbow Warrior II

[Via Die Puny Humans] "On May 26th 2004, the Greenpeace flagship, the SV Rainbow Warrior left Auckland, New Zealand, on a voyage around the surrounding waters. Our mission: To highlight the irreversible damage caused to deep sea life by bottom trawling. Every day, the ship's crew will be publishing their experiences here... "

Isn't it ironic that one of the only acts of terrorism in New Zealand history, the bombing of the Rainbow Warrior was carried out by the French?

The Corporation


I'm looking forward to seeing The Corporation - A film by Mark Achbar, Jennifer Abbott, and Joel Bakan (Via Martin G.) which is showing in New Zealand at the International Film Festival [from July 9 -August 1, 2004.] There is also a book: The Corporation : The Pathological Pursuit of Profit and Power by Joel Bakan.

Ray Anderson, CEO of Interface says:
"Since Rachel Carson's Silent Spring began to expose the abuses of the modern industrial system, there has been a growing awareness that profit at the expense of Earth--of individuals, society, and the environment--is unsustainable. Joel Bakan has performed a valuable service to corporations everywhere by holding up a mirror for them to see their destructive selves as others see them. The clarion call for change is here for all who would listen."

Ray Anderson is a multi-millionaire former capitalist polluter turned environmentalist. He has restructured his whole business so that sustainability is now considered as important as profitability, and sees a "future that merges economic growth with social responsibility."

I like the sound of that future, and hope we can do our own little bit at TMet Recordings. It's becoming evident that many business models are unsustainable and a major threat to the planet. My corporate heroes are the geeks at Google. I love the fact that they freely admit in the their IPO statement that it's likely their incredible growth rate is unsustainable and likely to slow down. They are being open, honest, realistic and above all fair to the people who have made them such an enormous success - their team of 2,000 employees. Maybe the geeks shall inherit the earth.

NZ National Anthems

TV2 is holding a 24 hour NZ music special to raise money for the Play it Strange project to get more NZ youngsters making music. 24 hours of New Zealand Music. Yay! The WBC are currently playing and it's the first time I've seen them perform live on TV. They are totally skanking and I'm stoked we've signed some breakbeat remixes of their tracks to our label.

Towels spontaneously combust


"A stack of hot towels, straight from the dryer, has sparked an emergency in a Wellington central city apartment.Fire-fighters were called when smoke started pouring from the windows of the second story Torrens Terrace apartment. The pile of towels had spontaneously ignited. The Fire Service says it is best to let towels air after they have been through a dryer to let them cool."

Thankfully most of my towels dry in the breeze. It comes from many years of being skint but I only use the dryer when I have to. Clothes smell nicer when they've been on the washing line. And they won't burn your house down. I've already lost everything I had in a fire when I was 18. Luckily no-one was hurt but I was literally left with the clothes I stood up in. In hindsight it was one of the best things to happen to me as it got me off my arse and down to Bristol. It also made me realise that the best things in life aren't things, and how little I need to be happy.

Weta Fine Art

"The Wellington City Council is to spend $300,000 on a tribute to New Zealand's film industry. Peter Jackson's Oscar-winning Weta Workshop team has been asked to come up with the goods. Yesterday's proposal drew flak from some councillors who argued commissioning the city's famous son to make the monument could be seen as nepotism." Weta to design tribute to NZ film

Who better can you think of than Weta to design a sculpture to grace Courtney Place?

Insta-hair
I had some hair extensions put in today at the Hair Braiding Studio on the ground floor of St Kevin's arcade, K'Rd. I first had extensions in the early 90s which were long white monofibre, and looked (and felt) like Barbie hair. I then had long black plaits that made a very effective weapon for beating off sleazy guys in clubs. When you're a stage dancer and not wearing a lot, it's a handy way of keeping men at plaits length.

My new flowing locks are black human hair that feels much softer than monofibre. I've been wondering about the girl whose hair it was. What did she look like, where was she from and why did she sell her hair? Rather then having it glued in, it's been woven and sewn into my own hair. My last extensions took over eight hours to put in but these were done in two.

It does take a bit of getting used to going from short to long hair. Like having to use a hairbrush again. I've been swishing it around like a three year old pretending to be my little pony. I've also been wearing girlie bunches and rediscovering the hair accessory. The best thing about extensions is I can abuse them as much as I want as I won't be toasting my own hair.

A reader has emailed me to ask if you can wash monofibre hair extensions. I used to rinse mine out twice a week and wash them once a week using specialist Dome Monofibre shampoo and conditioner. But you can also use gentle fabric liquid and fabric softener on Monofibre extensions as they are made from artifical fibres. Obviously keep the fabric wash/conditioner away from your scalp, and use a gentle shampoo & conditioner there instead.

If your extensions are glued in, then be careful not to let hair conditioner get too close to the glue, as it soften it and make your extensions slide out. If you heat style Monobribre hair it will stay in shape much longer than human hair, but be careful not to burn the monofibre. You can wash and style human hair extensions as you would your own hair.

Pink Dinosaur found in New Zealand volcano

Found on Ana Samways' Sideswipe section at the back of the New Zealand Herald:

"John Callan of Geological and Nuclear Sciences (GNS) writes: "Some wag has glued a pink dinosaur in front of our digital camera on White Island in the Bay of Plenty. The camera takes a pic of the White Island crater every hour and puts it on the GeoNet website - for all to see. A number of people have been emailing us asking what the dinosaur is all about. I advise them that 'Dino' has assumed the role of White Island mascot and protector of our volcano monitoring equipment. We at GNS hope Dino sticks around for a while, but we doubt he will have the staying power of his ancestors. The acid environment on White Island gives plastic a fairly hard time."

You can see little pink Dino here: Volcano Cameras - New Zealand

Bare Naked Consumers
I've come across the excellent Barlow's Blog, a Canadian musician who talks about politics, popculture, philosophy and sophistry. I particularly liked his post on Christianity.

"I have a massive amount of respect and admiration for religious people. People who study their religion and pray to their God; people who embrace a relationship with their religious community. People who call themselves Christian and haven’t read the manual, drive me crazy...How about this often ignored commandment. I mean there are only ten of the things you figure people would read them all.

#10 "You shall not covet you neighbor's house; you shall not covet your neighbor's wife or his male servant or his ox or his donkey or anything that belongs to your neighbor."

Every day Americans see thousands of advertisements. The ONLY purpose of these ads is to get you to covet something. Our economy is driven by coveting as is our entire culture and the American dream it self. If we stopped wanting our neighbour’s stuff we would have a recession of devastating proportion."

I used to be a Consumer and a shoe addict. I even developed a case of shopping bulimia back in the UK. I was so unhappy in my job that I used to spend every lunchtine buying crap, get a brief high as I left the shop and then spend all afternoon wondering how I could take it back the next day. Then I moved back to New Zealand and spent a year living in the countryside, away from the bombardment of billboards, bus ads, and all the fads & fashions of the city. Now I’m a good Westie chick and live in Ugg boots for 6 months of the year.

I enjoy the column in the Sunday Star times by Jo McCarroll, a Kiwi hackette currently based in the UK. She went on a recent press trip to Serbia and charts the frustrations she and her fellow hacks went through when they found it impossible to buy any ‘luxurious little frivolities.’

“After a couple of days, we were practically elbowing each other out of the way to pay for rounds of drinks. At Belgrade airport on the way home I begged for an opportunity to buy everyone overpriced water and snack food. “Spare change, spare change” I pleaded, holding out a fistful of notes like a reverse begger, “I’ve got all this spare change.”

It made me think about how much pointless consumerism there is. When did wasting money become the nearest thing we have to a shared hobby? On arriving at the 24-7 shopping mall that is Heathrow, I took a long hard look at my core political values and asked myself: do I really need a 15th sheer pink lipstick?”

She bought the lipstick by the way.

The Jedi Street Preachers

Feel the Force:
The Jedi Street Preachers of Auckland City.

I'm a convert! Where do I sign?

Inner Dreams and Outer Space

I've been email chatting to Inner Dream Records a digital dance label in LA. I came across them on World DJ, the Wellington based site for producers and DJs. Inner Dream Records have been putting out chillout compilations on iTunes and have been doing really well. Their Midnight Massive 1 and Port Authority "Desert Skys" releases have both been in the top 100 electronic albums on iTunes this month.

All our new tracks are now live for sale in the TMet shop and I'm getting ready to send label promos out to radio stations. I spoke to The Studio [a dance station in Queenstown], and the lovely Andy at Pulzar FM in Christchurch, who got very excited when he heard about Si-Fi's new Dr Who track The Return of Davros.

Apparently Andy Pulzar set up the New Zealand Dr Who fan club back in the day!

Looking for tits?

I've just added a Search this Site function at the bottom of each page, so if you know me you can see how many times I've written about you, and if you don't you can amuse yourself by searching for tits. Which seems to be an extremely common past time looking at my stats. And in case you're on a mission to find tits and have been disappointed to find some Kiwi chick prattling away, apparently Big Naturals [NOT work safe] is one of the most popular sites on the net today.

Temperatures rising to Farenheit 911
CANNES, France (Reuters) "Critics rank Michael Moore as one of the favourites to land the top prize at the Cannes film Festival after his blistering anti-Bush documentary won a standing ovation. 'Fahrenheit 911' is now firmly in line to be the first documentary to land the Palme d'Or since Jacques Cousteau and Louis Malle's marine epic 'The World of Silence' in 1956." Moore's anti-Bush film a Cannes favourite

Update 23/5/04:
Michael Moore wins the Palme d'Or.

I can't wait to see this film. I suppose in some ways we have George W Bush IIIrd to thank for our record label. If it hadn't been for Bush's cynical manipulation of the 911 tragedy to seize power in the US (which we watched played out live on US TV), then Chelfyn would never have made The Evil Plans of George W Bush IIIrd, and we might not have a record label.

So thanks George. We dedicate Evil Plans to your re-election campaign!

The birds and the bees?
"A German couple who went to a fertility clinic after eight years of marriage have found out why they are still childless - they weren't having sex."

Blimey.

A Modern Day War of the Worlds
"A BBC spokeswoman admitted there was no simulation warning immediately prior to the show's broadcast, but said the BBC regularly informed viewers as to the fictional nature of the exercise throughout the 60-minute programme." BBC terror film panics viewers

Waking Life

"They say that dreams are real only as long as they last. Couldn't you say the same thing about life?'" A debate I've had on many a Sunday morning. I'm going to have to watch Waking Life quite a few times before I can properly review it, but it's an awesome piece of animation by Richard Linklater that I highly recommend. It's a fluid sequence of philosphical discussions about life, reality and dreams. There's an excellent anaysis of Waking Life at this site, and an interview with Richard Linklater. Waking Life is guaranteed to expand your mind / mess with your head!

Dispelling the Digital Downloading Myths

I have always been suspicions of claims by the majors labels that downloading is responsible for falling music sales. I think it's more likely to be the fact that a lot of the their music is complete and utter shit. They are sqealing like piglets finally wrenched from their mother's teat. They just don't get the fact that now that people have more online options they are buying their music elsewhere. That's right b-u-y-i-n-g, as in parting with money to acquire digitally distributed tracks. Even little TMet Recordings are proof of that. So I found this article by Moses Avalon (who wrote Confessions of a Record Producer: How to survive the scams and shams of the Music Industry) extremely interesting: Downloads not responsible for dropping sales

His investigations show that "even though actual point-of-purchase sales are up by about 9% in the US - and the industry sold over 13,000,000 more units in 2004 (1st quarter) than in 2003 (1st quarter) - the Industry is still claiming a loss of 7% because RIAA members shipped 7% fewer records than in 2003... here's an oversimplified example: I shipped 1000 units last year and sold 700 of them. This year I sold 770 units but shipped only 930 units. I shipped 10% less units this year. And this is what the RIAA wants the public to accept as "a loss."

He finishes with a bald statement: "My analysis suggests that the number one reason for the loss of jobs in the industry is self-perpetuating major label PR, and that the number one cause of loss of unit sales revenue for artists is STILL record label accounting practices."

This is backed up research by a Harvard professor who found that the file-sharing effect on record sales is "statistically indistinguishable from zero".

We work on a trust basis at TMet Recordings. We really believe that if we release great tracks at a fair price, and pay our artists 50% of the profit, then people will support us and buy our music. And it's starting to work. We may only be getting a trickle of sales right now, but we've only just started spreading the word. Within a weeks of signing to our label young New Zealand artists are selling their tracks globally and realising their dreams. Most musicians just want their music to be heard, enjoyed and to able to make a living from it and more of them can on the digital frontier. Vive la digital revolution!

TMet need your help. If you come across this blog, please take a minute or two and check out our new releases page. All track have a free 1 minute preview so you can try before you buy. There is something for everyone from breaks to chillout and we even have a release by a NZ 8 year old.

So please help us spread the TMet word and tell your friends about tmet.co.nz a groovy little digital dance label at the bottom of the world!

A conversation you never expected to have with your Dad
From Caribou, a Wellington Blogette.



"Dad: What's that damn bird making that noise for?
Me: He's having a wank against the side of his bell, actually.
Dad: Oh.
Me: Yep, best leave him to it.
Dad: What about the other bird, what's she doing?
Me: She's asleep in the box.
Dad: She's going to be furious when she finds out.
Me: I doubt it.
Dad: He doesn't need to do that when he's got another bird right there.
Me: Maybe they have incompatible libidos.
Dad: No, he's being disrespectful.
Me: At least he's not cheating on her with some diseased bird-ho.
Dad: You're a pragmatic girl, aren't you?
Me: Right, I think he's nearing orgasm, I'm going to get the mail in."

I'll never look at a budgie in the same way ever again.

The Sisters of Misconception
I'm watching a Cirque du Soleil performance on TV. It's an utterly breathtaking montage of theatre, opera and exquisite human endeavour. I've always adored circus and was lucky enought to spend at every summer for 10 years at Worthy Farm in Pilton for Glastonbury Festival of Performing Arts. I was a stage manager working in the Theatre and Circus Fields for Arabella Churchill [Sir Winston's grandaughter] before going walkabout and doing Street Theatre as The Sisters of Misconception [a group of fetish nuns] and De Facto Films [a coked up camera crew].

I think the Theatre and Circus backstage is the best place on site to hang. You don't get the media hoopla like behind the music stages and it's a only a short behind the scenes hop to the Cabaret Marquee, Jazz Stage and Green Fields. The Green Room has a cocktail bar and restaurant with a volleyball net that people juggle over outside. Sometimes bands head over from the main stages to do accoustic sets, and there is live comedy every night. You wake up to people walking past your tent on their hands and go to sleep to the sounds of laughter.



One year I had to look after Napthalene the fire performers from French anarcho-circus Archaos. These are the guys that the chainsaw jugglers considered mad. Their big Saturday performance was to include a walkabout through the Theatre fields, or that's what we thought.

I'd just finished my shift as a stage manager and had rewarded myself by sharing a spliff with the crew. Someone came running up to me with a fluoro jacket and a bottle of water as theu were one fire steward short. The deal was that their 4 insect Creatures [enormous 8 legged beasts made up of two performers wearing leg and hand stilts] would wander through the fields, with the rest of the troupe on foot letting off thunderflashes. When a thunderflash has gone off you throw it on the ground where it stays red hot. Our job was to pour water on them in case a munted members of the public decided to pick up the pretty glowing things.

The Creatures set off from the Outside Theatre Stage, through the Circus Field and into the other Theatre field past the Cabaret Marquee and Funfair. At this point they were meant to double back but instead they started heading off towards Babylon. To Glastonbury crew the site is divided in two. Avalon (Theatre, Circus, Jazz, and the Green Fields), and Babylon which starts in the Market Fields. It pretty much covers the rest of the site and all the big music stages. Once the festival has kicked off you pretty much stay backstage or in Avalon until Sunday night. You cannot conceive how big Glastonbury really is. A city of around 200,000 people set on a dairy farm (or three) in the South West of the UK for one weekend a year.



So these 4 towering bug like Creatures with their mad French attendents, are merrily throwing hot glowing things in the path of addled festival goers and heading off towards the crowded Market Fields with me trying to head them off in stoned and rusty French. By this point our water supplies are running low, and I have double vision from pouring water on hot glowing things. We ended up begging water off stallholders and chasing after the insane Creatures. By the time we made it back to the safety of the Theatre Fields I had collapsed. And what did Napthalene do? They towered over me with a crazy look in their eyes laughing. Trust me - out of all the freaks in the circus - watch out for French fire performers.



If you are one of the lucky ones to have a Glastonbury ticket this year, make sure you make it out of Babylon at least once. Getting to see the biggest bands in the world is great but there is so much more than the music. Go and see a solar powered circus in the Green Futures Field, or have a go on an outdoor trapeze. See Steve Crumbie and his Amazing Spike of Death on the Outside Theatre Stage or the wacth the best walkabout performers in the world wandering the site. Glastonbury. Probably the best festival in the world.

Glastonbury Festival 2000 pics from: www.efestivals.co.uk
Aerial pics: www.lastrefuge.co.uk

The Universal Language of Dance


Chelfyn and I have been listening to the new Nick Sentience album Universal Language at the studios all week. After hearing a lot of hard dance in the past couple of years it's a refreshing change of style and pace. It's really good breakbeat trance that borrows elements from all the dance genres. Fat drum & bass, growly deep acid lines giving a full body workout with trancey head breaks. It also passes the Leftism test - an album that's mellow and background on low and banging when you crank it up. Universal Language has all the makings of a classic, and I'll definitely be playing some on my radio show this week.



Favourite track & name? Digeridon't.

A Hobbit Wedding

"Dianna’s pet name for Steve has always been Hobbit. Its quite a fitting nickname for them as you will all know, they are small, lead a mostly simple life, and really like to eat!"

The happy hobbits' 10 reasons for loving each other are really rather sweet:

"Because he is willing to tolerate my road trips, horrible droning lesbian music, singing loudly and WAY off key"

"Because she has the best tits in the universe " and my favourite: "Because geeks make her horny"

Twisted Bits
We've just got net access in the Twisted studios so we can get email, chat or IM during our shows. I'm really enjoying my Twisted Friday drive show, it's a lovely way to start the weekend. I leave the studios and head into town about 4.00 p.m. going against the traffic flow and feeling thankful that I'm not stuck on the other side of Highway 16.



The Twisted studios are in St Kevin's Arcade on Karangahape Road (K'Rd) which is at the seamier end of town. I love K'Rd. It's a fabulously gritty and diverse place. There's funky shops, clubs, bars, sex shops, Stairway to Heaven, The Mermaid Bar, all night dairies and ethnic cafes. It's a little bit, Brixton, very SoHo and I love its vibrancy. St Kevin's Arcade (about half way along on the virtual K'Rd tour) is a groovy and ecletic mix of old and new. Second Hand clothes and book shops next to up and coming Kiwi designers, a hairbraiding studio, a juggling shop, and three radio stations upstairs. There's a close knit community feel to the arcade and it has a lot of soul.

The Twisted studio has a great view of the Sky Tower, which gives a Futurama feel to the Auckland skyline. When the window is open you get delicious smells wafting up from the Thai place downstairs, and hear occasional strains of D&B from the Julia studio next door. My drive show is from 5.00 and I open with some chill out or comedy to help people wind down from the week. Though maybe playing Rat Race by the Specials to people stuck in traffic last week may have been a tad unfair.

I get a real buzz after the gig guide at half five, when I start playing Kiwi music from our record label. As well as some Data:Bass Drum & Bass, I dropped a new track fresh in from Si-Fi this week. It's called The Return of Davros and is a D&B Dr Who remix.

Zana Mills in the USA


I've just heard that the lovely Zana Mills who I interviewed at the UPfm beach party in February, has been made a resident DJ for Fevah USA. Fevah has been going for seven years now and is a well known label and clubbing brand in New Zealand, Australia, and the UK. Zana's a cute Kylie sized Kiwi with a banging box of tunes & the cheekiest grin. I think she'll go a long way.

NZ Music - Global News


TMet are front page today of the Mi2N Music News Network. Groovy.

Quarantine - the sickest reality TV ever


"IT IS, literally, the sickest reality TV show yet. Contestants are locked in a lab and exposed to infections which can cause all sorts of bodily mayhem... in return for the chance to win UKP 100,000.": QUARANTINE: HOW SICK IS REALITY TV?

Thankfully it's a spoof but people actually applied to be contestants!

Deer and the City


Apparently Muntjac Deer have been seen in the inner city area of Bristol where I used to live: Deer in the Allotments. I loved living in St Weburghs. It was like a countryside community in the inner city with organic food shops, hippy buses and a city farm that you could hear (and smell) from the local pub. I spent a lot of time at The Farm Pub, the best place to go for directions to Free Parties in the South West. They also did a fine Sunday Roast. If I'd seen a deer on the allotments back then I'd have blamed it on the beer.

Blogtastic


I've been playing with the new Blogger interface today and have to give it the thumbs up. It looks curvier, has enough new features and help information to make blogging easier without becoming bloatware. Well done Bloggies!

P.S. You can now add comments.

Winning isn't everything
"One of New Zealand's top junior athletes forfeited his chance of winning a third world title yesterday to help a seriously ill team-mate. Bozzone sacrifices chance of world title to help ill mate."

My respect to Terenzo Bozzone for stopping and doing the right thing rather than cycling on by like the rest of the pack. He's also a total babe!

Nitro a Go Go
It gives your night an extra glow when you know your money is going to a great cause. The Nitro Angelcare fundraiser raised almost $2000 by serving up a superb showcase of local Kiwi talent, playing a range of genres across two rooms. No versus thing here - it started with a B2B with The Kyle and Chelfyn Show and finished up with a B2B from the terror tag team of Taz & Terry Whizz.

I had to giggle at the blonde groupie who kept throwing herself at the male UPfm DJs. She was like an over enthusiastic Labrador puppy trying to hump their legs. Lolli and I told her we were UPfm DJs but we were ignored being girls. She even introduced herself as a DJ's ex-girlfriend. Bless. I hope she eventually learns some self respect. I've never been able to get the 'I shagged the DJ' thing. They're all obsessive vinyl geeks!

Still a great night was had by all, and there were lots of fresh new faces basking in the glowing environment from the Tangent crew. Nitro is the perfect suck it and see event for newcomers to the Auckland dance scene. As for that picture - do not be fooled by Kyle on the right. He's not angelic in the least.

Nitro Photo Galleries:
Biggie (by Bob), NZ Rave: Set 1 (by Lil Miss Twisted) / Set 2 (by Gouba).

We've become so busy with running the label that after 18 months of playing banging tunes and talking bollocks we've finally had to drop our Saturday night UPfm show. It's been a lot of fun and we send our best wishes for the future to the management and UPfm crew.

If you can't fit through the door - you're not allowed in the store

"Fast food outlets should be made to have narrower front doors to prevent overweight people from going in to buy junk food, a leading medical expert has claimed." That sounds very sensible to me. If you can't fit through the door - you're not allowed in the store. I'm currently reading Fast Food Nation. If you are what you eat then most Americans are bullshit.Once you know how your meat is processed you'll never eat another burger or chicken muck-nugget in the US of A. It may be the ultimate diet book yet!

Thankfully New Zealand cows still eat grass and we have some of the purest meat in the world: Clean green grass of home a sure winner for NZ food industry

Queen for a day
"Who wouldn't want to be a drag queen? Isn't it all about overdressing and flouncing around being bitchy with gay men and belting out pop tunes and hits from the shows? Is that so different from a decent girls' night out? Feather boas, fishnets, leopard-print and false eyelashes have all been staples of my party look since my teens, so why not simply take it up a notch, wear them all at once, throw in some falsies and do drag?"

My inner Drag Queen started with Fifi Trixibelle, an alter-ego I developed while working at The Comedy Box in Bristol. I was the hostess of a gameshow called Win Some Beer with compere Kev F, where the grand prize was - some beer. I wore a blonde bouffant wig, false eyelashes, minis, kinky boots and ditzed my way around the stage, removing the wig at the end to reveal a bleached blonde skin head. From Drag Girl to Tank Girl in one smooth move. We also used to do this countdown bit to the theme of the cheesy TV show Countdown and for years people kept coming up to me and doing it in Bristol clubs!

Here's a clip of Kev F's show Rude Heath

Slink yourself slim and sexy


"Run by women for women. Our pole dancing classes are a fantastic way of getting fit, having fun and meeting new people. They are not designed for professional training but rather to teach you a new skill, get you fit, allow you to develop your more sensual, sexy side and in so doing, increase your confidence. With celebrities such as Kate Moss, Sadie Frost, Zoe Ball, Daryl Hannah and Heather Graham all publicly declaring their allegiance to the pole, pole dancing is fast becoming the number one dance choice for all types of women."

All I know is every pole dancer I've ever known has had a body to die for. Dancing not only keeps you slim, it keeps you happy.

iWorkWithFools.com


"The company that I work for has recently hired a new CFO and do you know what this CFO does in the office? He digs his finger way up inside his nose, picks something out and then looks and checks it out before he attempts to flick it off his finger,with employees scrambling to get out of the way."

Ricky Gervais has to write that one into the next series of The Office. If you work for fools then you may find this site useful: How to deal with bad bosses, problem supervisors and difficult managers.

The Teddyborg

Resistance is Furtile.

Win a Life!

From their Win a Life' Diary:

"Our tranisition from anonymous English family to New Zealand celebrities was as rapid as it was exciting, here's our story in brief: In June 2003 the Napier City Council launched the "Win A LIfe in Napier" promotion. The prize was substantial enough - 6 months living, working and playing in beautiful, sunny Napier, house, car and employment included - to gain international media attention. It also gained the attention of small family in Reading, England. With humble hopes we entered the competition, along with 2700 other families.To cut a very long story short - WE WON! So here we are, living our new life in Napier!"

New Zealand News - NZ - Napier's 'win a life' family decides to stay. Yay!

Hits and Giggles

Not only is is NZ Music Month - the NZ International Comedy Festival is also running from the 30th April to the 22 May.

Looking through the programme I noticed that Tineke, the UPfm morning request show host is doing an all female show called Barbie is Dead. It's running at the Covert Theatre on K'Rd from the 19th May. Apparently it's 100% improvised, 100% female and 100% funny.


If Tineke's anything to go by
- it's going to be a hoot!

How to Skank

Backy Skank: "To 'Skank' is a specific way of dancing to ska music which previously was referred to as 'Rootsman skank','S-90 Skank' or the 'Backy Skank'. It also refers to the offbeat rhythm groove played by the guitar or keyboard. As ska music developed into different styles over the years, so too have the dance steps developed..."

WANNA BE IN A VIDEO?
The WBC Auckland’s funkiest Ska band need some energetic people to be in their new music video for "Sick Of It". They're shooting it in central Auckland on Sunday the 9th of May 2004, and you’ll be needed for 2-3 hours. You must be willing to dance, skank and generally go crazy in front of the camera. email video@thewbc.com for details.

Hemp Plastic? Fantastic!
“The world doesn't need another plastic DVD case, CD case or any other plastic case. The millions manufactured, sold and dumped daily is a horror story. How they are manufactured and by what process is yet another horror story. It's all to do with the fact that they are made by petro-chemicals.

Petro-chemicals are a finite resource. As well as a source for our fuel they are the foundation for many of the items we find around us every day. Our computers, mobile phones, body-care containers, water bottles, furniture and even clothing. The use of these products are increasing. This cannot continue sustainably without further global warming.

So now we have an alternative Hemp Plastic, in its many forms will replace some of the petro-chemical based plastics around us with sustainable plant based fibres. The first product being the hemp plastic CD and DVD tray. These trays are used in their billions annually. We may only buy one- but what one we buy will make the difference. It is great to know of a really responsible product on the market.”

------ Dame Anita Roddick DBE, Founder The Body Shop. -------

Paper DVDs
New Scientist: New Blu-Ray video disk is made of paper: "A new type of Blu-Ray digital video disk made largely from paper has been developed by Sony and Toppan Printing in Japan. The two companies say such paper-based disks will be cheaper to make and less environmentally harmful."

Banzai Bonsai
Bonsai Potato - Zen Without the Wait!

Lucire - From pixels to print

Lucire, the next print fashion magazine: Jack Yan reveals branding ideas. From October Lucire the global fashion magazine based in Wellington will be going from pixels to print. And who said New Zealanders aren't stylish?

The man behind the brand is Jack Yan who co-authored a book in 2003 called Beyond Branding:How the New Values of Transparency and Integrity Are Changing the World of Brands. It's something we feel very strongly about at TMet. In business you are constantly faced with difficult choices. As well as asking is it legal, I wish more people would ask is it ethical? I'd much rather be standing on the shoulders of giants than the corpses of people I've stabbed in the back along the way.

Scribe Still Dreaming


Scribe enters the Australian charts at Number 25. If you want to know why the Lyrical Bro from Xchurch is doing so well check out his Lyrics to Dreaming:

"dream, I didn't care about pay, I sacrificed late nights and going out with my friends, Just to stay home alone with my pad and my pen, Had my eyes on my prize, my mind on my goal, As I carved these rhymes out with my heart and my soul, I didn't have a CD, all I had was a tape, On the dole, through my flow was my only escape, From a world where they didn't want to see me prevail, Don't want to see me take it all, they'd rather see me fail, It's like...

I was down and out, struggling, Wondered how I'm gonna make it through, I got a dream (I got a dream), Holding on (I'm-a hold on), I can't let go 'cos I gotta make it come true.

Yo, I got a dream to make it big in New York, Give up the drugs and alcohol, I didn't want to distort, My vision, to be living life to the full, And I wouldn't have made it if it wasn't for you, You picked me up every time that I fell, When I was going through hell, you told that me that I would prevail, You said I had exactly what it took to be great, That I was young and in the future what a man I would make, It's like, you saw something in me I couldn't see, You said I would succeed and be anything I wanted to be, I'm twenty-three and I just want to be me, Want to be free, want to be everything I can be, But I don't have many choices, can't afford to be wrong, All I do is try to stay true to the words in my song, Just don't hesitate and wait too long, 'Cos like a dream when you wake up, it's gone, It's gone...

I was down and out, Struggling, Wondered how I'm gonna make it through, (I had no money in my pockets) I got a dream, (All I had was a pad and a pen) Holding on, (It's all I ever needed) I won't let go 'cos I gotta make it come true.

Yo, It was a sunny day, and we were feeling high, Jamming the song underneath a baby-blue sky, Thinking back in the time, when we were so poor, Remember the kids used to laugh at the clothes we wore, We always knew one day, that things were gonna change And from that day I was never gonna be the same, I went to sleep that night, I dreamt I touched the sky, And ever since I been trying to keep my dream alive, So when you see the Scribe, dropping the iller rhyme, Defining how I'm living mine, in this day and time, I'm working 9-to-5, I'm slaving over beats, It's hard work living the dream, I hardly ever sleep, I'm in the rhythm deep, yo, just trying to do my thing, It's funny when you're shining people hate to see the gleam, No matter what they say, keep on doing what you do, And don't give up 'cos only you can make that dream come true, It's like...

I was down and out (I was way out), Struggling, Wondered how I'm gonna make it through, I got a dream, Holding on, I can't let go 'cos I gotta make it come true.

I was down and out... Wondered how... I got a dream... I won't let go 'cos I got..."

Update 20/5/04
"We're going to the UK after this Australian tour but we don't have any big plans to try and take on America. That's something we don't really care about. We just enjoy doing it in our own country. There's a big enough scene over here, so if it happens it happens. We've just gotten lots of interest from the UK lately; now they're putting one of our tracks on a Ribena ad. I'm the Scribe 'cos I always write"

New NZ Music for NZ Music Month in May!
It’s been a big day for us today. It’s New Zealand Music month in May and Chelfyn and I have been adding all the new music that we’ve just signed to our digital indie label. Here's a clip of my current favourite: Unhealthy Activity by andy qroniq and The WBC. Only NZ$3 to buy it online. There are previews for each of the tracks on our new releases page with more to come. I know I'm biased but Kiwi music rocks eh?!

Go California!
California Bans E-Vote Machines

My name is Brush. Basil Brush.

One of the funniest things I've seen this weekend is the new Basil Brush. I loved him as a child and he has aged very well or as he puts it: "Not so much aged as matured, like fine wine. Or stinky cheese." He's still 'one for the ladies' and offered to help one dress with the purred reassurement "don't worry - I've warmed my paws".

Here's an interview with The Mighty Basil Brush.

Co-operative Craftwork
Sewn up by girls from Rio: "Craftwork from a workers’ co-operative in a shantytown is hot property worldwide."

The Googoracle of Delphi

Float offers insight into Google: "'Google is not a conventional company,' said Mr Brin and Mr Page. 'We do not intend to become one.' The two spell out their approach in a section entitled 'Don't be evil'. "

Ethical business. It can really work!

Glastonbury Genius

Giant sculpture for Glastonbury: A giant steel tower symbolising the global struggle for social and economic justice is to greet music fans arriving at the Glastonbury Festival in June. "I came up with the idea of having 12 large figures cut out of steel plate revolving on a big cylinder pulling a rope which should indicate the need for all people around the world to work and pull together," said Mr Eavis. Yay to Mr Eavis. One of the grooviest guys on the planet. It will be four years since we got married on the Pyramid Stage at Glastonbury. Four of the craziest but best years of my life!

Fairy Godfathers

I've just come across Fairy Godfathers, the British verison of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, the only TV show I watch religiously. I'm not ashamed to admit it QEFTSG has me in happy tears most weeks.

I don't want to 'get inside the mind of a serial killer' or see disembodied feet on Murder TV. Stuff like Extreme Makeover or Survivor are straight out of 2000AD.

Update 10/5/04:
"New Zealand comedian Terry Frisby starred as the sad bloke in need of an image overhaul on the first episode of the British version of the television show Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. "